” as I try to force inspiration into my face through judicious prescriptions of Macallan from my good friend Dr.Whiskey all the while cursing my laptop for betraying me by not magically producing the pages that the DMT elves promised me.
A Nice Guy traditionally finds himself in the Friend Zone in one of two ways: either he asks someone out and gets the Let’s Just Be Friends speech or else he never asks her out in the first place.
Either way, he strikes up a friendship with her instead – a friendship that is, at it’s core, predicated on her eventually realizing what a great guy he his, how he has all these amazing sides to him that she just has never seen before and that he’s actually pants-wettingly sexy.
I always appreciate it when a topic for an article happens to fall into my lap.
It saves me all of the time and anxiety that comes with writing a thrice-weekly column that usually culminates with the 3 AM insomnia-inducing panic that leads to my brain screaming “I HAVE RUN OUT OF IDEAS!
Either the Nice Guy sees an opportunity and makes his move – and gets shot down – or his crush gets a new boyfriend; this is usually seen as the last straw for the Nice Guy.
This event is celebrated in the manner traditional to the Nice Guy’s people: blowing up at the object of his affection for her “betrayal” of him or a long and often embarrassing rant on the Internet all about the perfidy of womankind. See, if you think back, really hard, you might vaguely remember a Platonic guy pal who always seemed to want to spend time with you.
And I’m sorry that it took the complete absence of “nice guys” in your life for you to realize that you missed them and wanted them.
Most women will only have a handful of nice guys stumble into their lives, if that.
In this case, the kernel of an article came to me via Twitter as one of my readers linked me to a post on Tumblr with a rant and blistering response between a “Nice Guy” and one of the many women who bought into the “Nice Guy” schtick.
The issue of the “Nice Guy” is one that is close to my cold, mercenary heart if only because I’ve spent so much time in that mindset and every “I’ve been friendzoned” rant brings familiar echoes of ones that I wrote myself and broadcast to the uncaring world wide web – ones that fortunately have been lost to the universe, never to be seen againprinted the t-shirt (another college experiment that has been destroyed) I feel the need to educate my Nice Guy brethren as to just what the big fucking problem is with the Nice Guy world view and just Let’s start with the most obvious issue here: the supposed “Nice Guy” is a liar from start to finish.
The Nice Guy spends his time trying to be as close to his designated crush as possible – after all, the more time he gets to spend with her, the more opportunities she gets to recognize his inner stud-muffin.