We’ve experimented with long emails and compared that to short messages.
We especially focused on the psychology that drives getting a woman to reply to your first message.
In the two years Lauren’s been on the site, she’s only gone on about 20 dates. 1 for everyone, I believe in a head-to-toe shot to show what you look like. “Even if an amazingly attractive girl said something stupid in their profile, she’ll still get messages. Since getting out of a long-term relationship with a “pathological liar” who had a drug problem, Lauren is open to everything in her “what I’m looking for section” and she means it. But don’t say that you’re looking for “casual sex.” Initially, Lauren selected “casual sex” as one of her “what I’m looking for” options and discovered that it “triggered a vulgar explosion of come-ons.” She got so many dick pics and online stalkers that she had to delete her account.Below, I’ve tried to cobbled together some Lauren’s secrets in the hopes that they might help the rest of us win at online dating. So I feel like I’m intelligent and people think I look good, so I guess it’s as simple as that? She has since opened a new profile that does not specify her interest in “casual sex” and has found that “the quality is better.” 5. Don’t feel obligated to respond to any massages, even if the guy seems normal, but just not for you. It says “Hey, I might be sort of interested in you, but I’m going to let you do all the legwork.” Don’t give her a nudge and expect her to then message you, because she probably won’t.This isn’t a cover letter for a job application; there’s really no need to be formal.I don’t smoke, but don’t mind if you do…Well, message me if you want to go out.” Messages like this are not only boring (if she wants to know about you she’ll either click on your profile or, even better, ask you), but they give no indication of why you want to go out with her. Try something like this instead: “Whoa, you studied abroad in Ghana? Once she laughs, she lets her guard-down a little, she thinks you’re funny, and probably smart. Did you ask her a question, did you set-up a joke she could build on?
Not that you have to turn into Seth Rogen all of the sudden, but in general, on the internet, humor is far less abrasive than, say, ardent fervor.
I’ve since learned a lot about sending first emails.
One of the biggest things is to screen the women you’re thinking about writing to so that it improves your chances of getting a response.
I’ve got a couple of tips to help you decide which women you should write to, and which women you want to ignore. I would ask a question about something they were interested in. I started sending short messages like, “Hey, I really like your profile. I quoted something from one of their favorite books or movies. I tried about everything I could think of and for the longest time, nothing worked.
Click here for a complete system for writing first emails… Then I stumbled on a system of writing first emails that women replied to. I was just so fed up with it all that I was trying anything at all. That system is a system for getting women to reply to your messages on Ok Cupid, or any other online dating site for that matter. Talk to you soon—JT How do you write your first message to a woman?
Girls on online dating sites really can get bombarded with messages, and at that point, they’re not really likely to spend more than 15 seconds quickly scanning through a message before decided to keep reading or not, . ” Later, once you guys have gone back and forth a few times, you can feel free to write longer, more involved messages.