And don't ask with your cell phone in your hand or your laptop open. Allowing children the opportunity to fail is one of the greatest gifts parents can give.
Solving small childhood problems prepares children for the bigger problems they'll face as adults.
Licensed psychologist, Nicole Beurkens, said telling kids "I know you will figure this out," solidifies the message that children are whole people who are capable and resourceful.
Another tip Zakeri gives is to talk to children while walking the dog or driving together in the car.
Sometimes making eye contact is too intimidating for kids.
But empty praise keeps kids from find meaning in their efforts.
Acknowledging when they've worked hard will go farther, said Lynn Zakeri, a mother and clinical therapist.
Taking away that intimidation will get kids to feel less judgement, and encourage them to open up more.
New York therapist, Kimberly Hershenson, said parents should point out concrete examples of their children's behavior, talents, kindness and character each day.
She said sometimes just saying "You are kind" can make it a reality.
Thompson said parents should make an effort to "catch" their kids doing something kind and acknowledge it.
Genuinely saying you're sorry when you lose your temper or make a mistake helps build trust.
Telling kids "great job" is fine if they've actually done a great job.
Hershenson said telling kids that you are grateful for them is just as important as telling them you love them.