) And remember how good that felt—to find the world so fascinating that you had to learn, this second and in great detail, exactly how it worked?Have we established that questions are marvelous, momentous things?
If so, can we agree that asking ourselves the right ones can have life-altering effects? If I answer, "No, I don't care what people think," I risk seeming arrogant.
Because have you ever noticed how questions prevent us from settling for less than we deserve? " is a great way to make things, well, a whole lot better? But if I answer, "Yes, I care too much about what people think," I risk seeming spineless.
But it's that last something—that sense of deep partnership in the best and worst times—that makes me know I'm with the right person; that makes me sure this marriage is, in every sense of the word, bashert.
—Julie Orringer, author, most recently, of the novel The Invisible Bridge In matters of love, you have to know where you draw the line.
We've lost a mother and a father between us; we've lived in six cities, worked countless jobs, survived autoimmune disease and smoking cessation.
We've lost six pregnancies and given birth to a son.
Remember when you were little and you felt like you might explode because you had so many questions? Was it when we became busy, distracted, overwhelmed grown-ups, feigning expertise, acting like we know everything all the time? And that all knowledge exists precisely because people have, persistently and for centuries, asked tons and tons of questions?
How did we lose touch with that desire to ask, ask, ask? Did we miss the part where Socrates, who supposedly said, "I know that I know nothing," developed an entire method of figuring out stuff based entirely on inquiry?
We're not talking about a soul mate, though modern usage often spins it that way; the original meaning is more complicated.
Your basherter won't always make you happy, and your life together won't always be easy. She used to spend hours talking to her friends about guys—analyzing, deciphering, strategizing—but when she started seeing the man who became her husband, all of that stopped.
And in times of both euphoria and despair, there's no one I would rather have at my side than my husband.